


"tell the teacher im gonna be late"

by sorin_shine



Category: Minecraft (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Chatting & Messaging, Clay | Dream and Toby Smith | Tubbo are Siblings, Crack, Gen, Social Media, Wilbur Soot and Technoblade and TommyInnit are Siblings, block men being stupid, dogwater plot its just funny no angst, no beta we die like wilbur, some occ because im a dumbass
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-05
Updated: 2021-03-06
Packaged: 2021-03-18 08:54:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,457
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29855631
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sorin_shine/pseuds/sorin_shine
Summary: smart asshole: i'll shit in ur frozen cokesmart asshole: u think im rich?????DUDUDUDU: hotsmart asshole: ASJDHEWUIFIW SHUT UPDUDUDUDU: FUCK THE TEACGES COGMGING OVER TO CHEKC HOMEWORJ YOU BETTER GIVE ME MCODJNALDS DURING BREKA OR I'LL JUMP YOU IN THE HALsmart asshole: perishchatfic with 0 plot just me not studying for exams
Relationships: No Romantic Relationship(s)
Comments: 3
Kudos: 43





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> i hope im funny enough for y'all

_\------------_

_Why did all 3 of you turn out like this_

_8:12AM_

_\------------_

**dadza pog:** Are all of you at school I had to leave early

 **CHILD:** CHANGE MY NAME IM NOT A CHILD 

**CHILD:** yes

 **stop playing guitar at 3am:** yea but i didnt see techno @ breakfast

**stop playing guitar at 3am:** _@the favourite_

**stop playing guitar at 3am:** _@the favourite_

**stop playing guitar at 3am:** _@the favourite_

**stop playing guitar at 3am:** _@the favourite_

**stop playing guitar at 3am:** _@the favourite_

**stop playing guitar at 3am:** _@the favourite_

**the favourite:** FUCK

 **stop playing guitar at 3am:** hurry up dont u have eng 1st period

 **the favourite:** stfu i couldn't sleep 

**CHILD:** HAHA IVE NEVER BEEN LATE

 **CHILD:** I'M A BIG MAN AND BIG MEN ARE NEVR LATE TO SCHOOL

 **CHILD:** GETTING THE EDUCATION AMIRITE?????????????

 **stop playing guitar at 3am:** idk i found ur reports and 

**stop playing guitar at 3am:** ur maths grade looking real good rn

 **CHILD:** NOT MY FAULT I CAN'T CALCULATE THE VERTEX OF A POLYGON 

**CHILD:** ALSO THAT'S USELESS I NEED TO LEARN ABOUT TAXES AND HOW TO AVOID DOING THEM 

**stop playing guitar at 3am:** i hate living under the same roof as you

 **CHILD:** BUT WE ARE BROTHERS AREN'T WE WILBY :(

 **stop playing guitar at 3am:** it doesnt work anymore 

**dadza pog:** STOP TEXTING DIDN'T CLASS START

 **the favourite:** father dearest that's very funny 

_\------------_

_technoblade minecraft please talk to me during class we are the only 2 who chose selective english_

_8:21AM_

_\------------_

**DUDUDUDU:** where r u

**DUDUDUDU:** _@smart asshole_

**DUDUDUDU:** _@smart asshole_

**DUDUDUDU:** _@smart asshole_

**DUDUDUDU:** WYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

 **smart asshole:** SOTP PIGNIGN ME IM FUCKOG RUNNIGN 

**DUDUDUDU:** WHY R U LATE

 **smart asshole:** I OVERSLEPT 

**DUDUDUDU:** did u do the homework bc i didnt n i need 2 copy

 **DUDUDUDU:** since when do u sleep lmao

 **smart asshole:** ffs do ur homework for once

 **smart asshole:** for ur information i didnt sleep for 2 days and passed out the second i walked into my room

 **DUDUDUDU:** take care of urself

**smart asshole: 👹👹👹**

**smart asshole:** bitch since when did u care LMAOOO

 **smart asshole:** im outside 

**smart asshole:** actually no im skipping eng 

**DUDUDUDU:** WAIT WE HAVE GROUP WORK TODYA NO 

**smart asshole:** do u want anything from mcdonalds

 **DUDUDUDU:** NOOOOO COME BACK

 **DUDUDUDU:** TECHNO FUCKING BLADE 

**DUDUDUDU:** I'LL TELL UR FATHER

 **smart asshole:** i'll shout u mcdonalds 

**DUDUDUDU:** 6 nuggets and a frozen coke 

**DUDUDUDU:** add a cheeseburger and i won't tell mr minecraft

 **smart asshole:** i'll shit in ur frozen coke 

**smart asshole:** u think im rich?????

 **DUDUDUDU:** hot

 **smart asshole:** ASJDHEWUIFIW SHUT UP

 **DUDUDUDU:** FUCK THE TEACGES COGMGING OVER TO CHEKC HOMEWORJ YOU BETTER GIVE ME MCODJNALDS DURING BREKA OR I'LL JUMP YOU IN THE HAL

 **smart asshole:** perish


	2. BOO(bs): im gonna piss my pants

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ranboo only goes to parties if the host has a pet

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> maybe its gonna have a plot lmfao idk but no angst 
> 
> besties im super nice to y'all :)
> 
> also making tubbo n dream siblings idk why just felt like it

_\------------_

_sapnap team fuck dream idk him_

_10:01AM_

_\------------_

**nappy man:** which one of u fuckers changed my name to this

**sleeping beauty:** hey

**nappy man:** george i'll bite you 

**sleeping beauty:** please dont i have a bite mark scar from dream

**nappy man:** oh? 👀 👀 👀

**sleeping beauty:** OK TO CLARIFY I TOOK A SIP OF HIS SPRITE AND HE BIT ME ON THE ARM 

**nappy man:** deserved

**sleeping beauty:** wheres your classroom i forgot

**nappy man:** im not @ school

**sleeping beauty:** why

**nappy man:** i overslept my dear gogy 

**sleeping beauty:** dont call me that

**nappy man:** why not my dear gogy?

**sleeping beauty:** wait hold on

**sleeping beauty:** are you going to skeppy's party

**nappy man:** yea 

**sleeping beauty:** ok good 

**nappy man:** why did u ask

**nappy man:** awww do u want me to be there 

**sleeping beauty:** sapnap i have a total of like 5.5 friends

**nappy man:** w

**nappy man:** .5??? 

**sleeping beauty:** quackity is the .5

**sleeping beauty:** because he's half our height

**nappy man:** r u trying to be funny 

**nappy man:** its kinda working gogy 

**sleeping beauty:** ykw fuck you bye 

**nappy man:** NOOOOOOOOOOO GOGY COME BACK LEMME GIVE U A KISS FIRST

_\------------_

_2 SMALL MAN + 1 BIG MAN_

_1:02PM_

_\------------_

**BOO(bs):** guys

**BOO(bs):** tell me ur going to that party too pls i dont know if he has any pets

**BIGGEST MAN ON EARTH:** HE HAS A BITCH

**bee :):** tommy please just call it a dog like a normal person

**BIGGEST MAN ON EARTH:** I AM NOT NORMAL UNLIKE YOU I AM BIGGER AND STRONGER 

**BOO(bs):** nvm i don't need y'all anymore the dog is there

**bee :):** ranboo can u socialise for once 

**BOO(bs):** tubbo ur asking for too much 

**BOO(bs):** no

**bee :):** wait who's invited

**BOO(bs):** _sent an image (0330.png)_

**bee :):** WHY DID HE INVITE THE WHOLE SCHOOL 

**bee :):** HOW BIG IS HIS HOUSE

**BIGGEST MAN ON EARTH:** I HAVE BEEN THERE

**BIGGEST MAN ON EARTH:** BLUE MAN AND TECHNOBLADE ARE FRIENDS 

**BIGGEST MAN ON EARTH:** HE SOMEHOW MADE A FRIEND IN MATHS

**BIGGEST MAN ON EARTH:** CONFUSING I KNOW

**BIGGEST MAN ON EARTH:** ALSO HIS HOUSE IS FUCKIN MASSIVE BUT HE STILL GETS NO PUSSY 

**BOO(bs):** MY PHONE HAS BEEN GOING OFF IN MY POCKET

**BOO(bs):** THE FRONT ROW LITERALLY TURNED AROUND 

**BOO(bs):** TOMMY I'M GOING TO HOST A KBBQ AND UR COW HENRY IS GONNA BE WAGYU SOON 

**bee :):** madboo madboo madboo

**BOO(bs):** im gonna piss my pants

_\------------_

_Why did all 3 of you turn out like this_

_2:34PM_

_\------------_

**stop playing guitar at 3am:** dad can i go to a party

**stop playing guitar at 3am:** _@dadza pog_

**stop playing guitar at 3am:** skeppy is hosting it

**stop playing guitar at 3am:** and no it isn't gonna be a repeat of last time

**the favourite:** what happened "last time"

**stop playing guitar at 3am:** shhhhh 

**CHILD:** OH I FORGOT TO ASK DAD CAN I GO TO SKEPPY'S PARTY TOO I'M ALSO INVITED 

**stop playing guitar at 3am:** techno ur coming with us idc

**the favourite:** no

**stop playing guitar at 3am:** stfu loner come with us

**the favourite:** i had to physically avoid skeppy today so he wouldn't bother me 

**CHILD:** CAN CONFIRM

**CHILD:** I SAW HIM CLIMB INTO HIS LOCKER JUST TO HIDE 

**CHILD:** _sent an image (3268.png)_

**stop playing guitar at 3am:** HGEYUWFHUIFH LMAOOAO

**stop playing guitar at 3am:** TECHNO U COULD'VE JUST RAN OR SM 

**CHILD:** U COULD'VE JUST STABBED HIM BIG T 

**CHILD:** U LITERALLY DO FENCING? JUST STAB HIM?

**the favourite:** you are all going to jail

**dadza pog:** What happened

**dadza pog:** @ _the favourite_ @ _CHILD_ @ _stop playing guitar at 3am_ Can you guys pay attention in class for once

**stop playing guitar at 3am:** can we go to skeppy's party

**dadza pog:** Fine

**dadza pog:** No drugs

**dadza pog:** No alcohol 

**stop playing guitar at 3am:** come back before 12am, no arson, no fortnite 19 dollar gift card, no stealing, no murder, no beating up someone in taco bell ok dad we know 

**CHILD:** DID YOU BEAT SOMEONE UP IN TACO BELL

**stop playing guitar at 3am:** no techno did

**the favourite:** YOU FUCKING SNITCH

**the favourite:** wilbur my dear brother where are you :)

**stop playing guitar at 3am:** oh would you look at the time im uh going to hangout with niki my dearest twin

**dadza pog:** Techno you beat someone up in taco bell?

**dadza pog:** Explain.

**the favourite:** dont worry about it

**CHILD:** LMAO IT WAS ON THE NEWS HAHAHA I FOUND IT

**CHILD:** https://www.nytimes.com/2021/03/07/us/teenager-starts-a-brawl-at-taco-bell-over-potatoes.html

**dadza pog:** POTATOES, TECHNOBLADE YOU STARTED A BRAWL OVER POTATOES?

**the favourite:** dad i won

**dadza pog:** Ok but why potatoes 

**the favourite:** dont worry about it

**dadza pog:** You have to go to the party with your brothers

**dadza pog:** Also you can't stay in your room all day for a week

**the favourite:** that's torture u cant do that to me 

**dadza pog:** It's not torture it's family bonding

**CHILD:** EW

_\------------_

_technoblade minecraft please talk to me during class we are the only 2 who chose selective english_

_2:58AM_

_\------------_

**DUDUDUDU:** TECHNOBLADE YOU FUCKER DID YOU POISON THE MCDONALDS

**DUDUDUDU:** IM SHITTING MY GUTS OUT

**DUDUDUDU:** HELP IM IN SO MUCH PAIN 

**DUDUDUDU:** TELL WILBUR I CANT HAVE ANY PIZZA DATES WITH HIM ANYMORE PPEASE

**smart asshole:** why r u on ur phone

**smart asshole:** u better disinfect ur phone later tf

**DUDUDUDU:** I'M GOING TO KILL YOU

**smart asshole:** how r u sure it was from the mcdonalds

**DUDUDUDU:** my mom would never poison me 

**smart asshole:** wait didnt u drink milk today 

**DUDUDUDU:** HOW DO U KNOW THAT I DRANK IT FOR DINNER

**smart asshole:** firstly

**smart asshole:** that's disgusting

**smart asshole:** secondly

**smart asshole:** tommy told me

**DUDUDUDU:** tubbo snitch

**smart asshole:** im going to sleep

**smart asshole:** i hope u shit and die

**DUDUDUDU:** FUCK YOU


End file.
